I’ve decided. I’m taking a holiday to a deserted island. On this island I will meditate, read books, get to know my husband and kid better and just take a break from all the B.S. So yeah, husband and kid, not truly a deserted island, and of course, I may see friends and neighbors and such, but the idea is I am staying off Facebook and Twitter for the month of July, and starting a little early, today.
This will be a challenge. Eschewing Facebook, I won’t be able to post about my many adventures, how I am taking my kid to see Brave tomorrow, how we’re going to the beach, how we’re going to see fireworks and it will be my kid’s first time. But, I also won’t get in frustrating discussions about politics and current events, or having to scroll and scroll and scroll through countless inane pictures of cats and ugly babies saying trite things with bad grammar. I’ll miss others’ posts about timely news items, the awful state of the Supreme Court, banking systems all over the world, corrupt churches and child molesters. Since I get a lot of tips on news items from my Twitter feed, I’m staying off there, too.
I worry about not being informed, but this is only for a month (for starters) and it’s summer. I’m supposed to be sipping cold drinks, vegging out poolside and enjoying long, lazy days with my family, right? Right?
I will, of course, still have to work for my clients. Gotta pay to keep the AC running, after all. But, this is a much-needed break to heal my hamster wheel brain and cleanse my sullied heart. I feel tainted by my angry, contentious thoughts when arguing points with friends, even if we keep it civil (some can’t even do that). I feel like a hypocrite reading Pema Chödrön and the Dalai Lama and then pounding out points meant to take someone else’s view down.
Often I listen with half an ear to a story my husband is telling me about his day or something he read or heard, while I read the latest “mommy wars” article, or learn of yet another non-fiction book I must read, or form my latest counter argument in some online debate. The other day while running our local trail, I saw a couple in their 60s strolling and it hit me—someday it’s going to be just me and him again and so I better keep in touch with him. We share a physical space, responsibilities, bills, sex, but honestly, my consciousness is more often keyed into to drivel on the internet. How ridiculous is that? My focus should definitely be on my life partner who I am supposed to be in love with!
And, of course, I won’t even start on how I need to pay more attention to my child because that is so obvious.
So, if you’ll excuse me, my plane is now boarding!